feeling bad

good morning! i am not feeling good today. yesterday i had a 'mild' head impact while out and now am in day one of a multi-day neurological injury cascade. i have to go out today to drive hours to go to the dispensary to get high-cbd mmj in day one post head-impact. it is 18 degrees f outside. there was snow yesterday and it isn't salted/plowed yet. i am worried about this. i also have to use all of my remaining money to get half a week of medical marijuana which if i do not have inflammation/spasticity/pain become so bad that i can't function. i needed to not get hurt yesterday but that is always true. i am remaining calmer than i normally do probably because i am exhausted. if you would like to help me have food and medicine for the next week, you can send monies to via google pay or paypal to numbatwombat21 at gmail. for the next week, for food/gas/medicine, which even if received, will run out on xmas, i probably need 300 - 400 dollars which is insane. the average cost of 1/8th of mmj in pa used to be $45 now it is $60 and much harder to find and much further away. many dispensaries don't have high-cbd mmj at all or have it only in vape pens which don't work anywhere near as well. so in the past year my monthly costs for this program have skyrocketed even though my use remains stable. it allows me to keep functioning at a job kind of even as i am clearly falling apart. if mmj allows me a managed end to my life that is a real blessing. please don't feel obligated or bad if you can't help my goodness the whole world is dying

PS: edit i just got back from my errand. i used more money than i should to secure a week's worth of mmj minus one disposable pen because the drive was so treacherous. i had to drive on multiple highways, like four? five? highways over an hour each way to go to a dispensary. what is stupid is that the ways in which i got the most hurt on this trip, of which there were many, the two worst were after i had gotten off of the highway and going towards home: one, a divot at a declining angle which is the absolute worst as it creates a neck injury angle somehow, compressing the spine or brain or whatever, and then after i got out of my car and walked the blocks from the cop/church parking lot down an alley i walked up to my apartment just as the two large trucks that were jumpstarting each other's batteries closed their hoods, sending powerful shock waves down into the alley passageway by my home, giving me a blast wave inside of my skull. i am in so much pain now. i have to live with no thought or expectation other than permanent severe chronic suffering. if i can master that then i will feel ok i guess or something idk. my skull feels like a bomb went off inside of it. sometimes i wonder if i have a csf leak and that is why i am so susceptible to car door slams. i feel like my ears are full all the time. i feel barometric pressure changes in my skull. car door slams give me immediate severe headaches that can last for days even if the car is not close to me if the angle is right. i am trying to learn not to shout out in pain when these things happen and start cursing. it is like being hit with a blunt object in the skull at a high velocity  so the natural inclination is to shout a curse word but then people start staring at you in the parking lot which is bad. my head and neck are in so much pain rn. i am going to take the meds i drove to get. please help if possible. i have to get through the next week/month gaah this hurts ok ilu ty <3